Ask Again, Yes

Author: Ask Again, Yes

Published: May 28, 2019

Publisher: Scribner

Where I picked up my book:  My Book of the Month Pick

Key Words: family dynamics, tragedy, mental illness, forgiveness

My Rating: 4

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My Thoughts:

I have always loved books that take me on a journey, span a length of time, introduce me to characters that I get to know in-depth and hit all of my emotions. Ask Again, Yes is exactly that.

First, let’s talk about the idea of flawed characters because this book is full of them! I have always thought that there is something really special about a flawed character because we, as humans, are all flawed. It’s in our nature to be flawed, so whenever I’m reading characters that aren’t perfect, don’t say the perfect things, or have some major character flaws, I’m sold.  These characters might think one thing and then do another, or think about someone they love in a negative way. They might actually do something that is hurtful or negative to someone and I’m always like…THANK THE BABY JESUS (not literally, I’m not religious, but you get my point). To me, flawed characters are relatable and I’m always here for them. This book is full of characters that are flawed (or I like to call, human) and I loved every second of it.

Second, the emotional roller coaster that this book takes you on is intense. It was a serious emotional whammy for me that I still might be recovering from, so prepare yourself for that when you pick up this book. You’re bound to laugh, cry, feel happy, feel angry, feel frustrated and at the same time-you’ll forgive, you’ll forget, you’ll love and you’ll hate all in a matter of minutes, or possibly…at the same time. Ultimately, it will make you think about your life and touch you in a way that goes beyond words, at least it did for me. It’s that sort of book-so come prepared.

Third, it had me thinking so much about forgiveness and tragedy, or more specifically, forgiveness within tragedy and this is hard for me. I would say I’m a forgiving person, but I don’t forget. I’m more of a, “you did me wrong and I’ll move on and give you a hug when I see you in person and laugh and hang with you as if it’s old times, but the odds of me calling you to hang out, inviting you to a small party or really thinking of you in a positive way without thinking about the hurt you caused me from here on out are slim to none.” So…I have a lot of work to do with forgiveness as you can see lol. Add tragedy to this and oof. This book walked me through what it takes to be a forgiving person, when forgiveness is necessary to move on with your life and when forgiveness gets in the way. It had me questioning whether it’s better to always forgive and if being a forgiving person always ends up well. I had a lot of feels around this and I’m still struggling a little bit to come up with the right answers to most of these questions. I love a book that does that to me.

All in all, I loved this book. It got me thinking, it gave me one hundred and one emotions and then some, and ultimately…it made me think about my life, forgiveness, how my past affects my present and future and how intense and complicated the idea of family really is. If you like books that span a long length of time, are character driven and full of things that will make you think long after you close the book, this one is for you!

As always, let me know what you thought when you read it and come find me over on Instagram!

bookishfolk…read instead.

Why I’m breaking up with the TBR list

Do you create a monthly TBR list at the beginning of the month and stick with it? I have so many good intentions to do so, but low and behold, the end of the month comes and generally speaking, I haven’t read a.single.one of the books in that pile. What is wrong with me?! That’s what I think every month when this happens. I see everyone’s TBR piles on Instagram at the beginning of the month and then their checked off lists at the end of the month and I’m all like, welp…another month bites the dust. And that’s not right. In fact, I’ve been reading fantastic books all month. I’ve been talking about books to everyone I see. I’ve been loving what I read. That’s where the focus should be but instead, this TBR piles staring at me from the dresser is where my focus often lands. So…this got me thinking about my personal reading habits, unique personality traits, the way I create intentions and why the heck I can’t seem to stick with a list of books to read to save my life. Here is what I came up with. If you are anything like me, this post might help you feel less guilty about your TBR list and instead, embrace the lack of that pile knowing you’re just doing you!

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  1. I get a lot of books from my local library and I’m at the mercy of the library as to when those books come in. So there are months when I get 8 books ready for me and usually, I only have a few weeks to read and return them. I LOVE MY LIBRARY and am always here to support them in any way possible. Public libraries raised me and they will always hold a special place in my heart. Supporting them in the least I can do. Plus, books are free for the borrowing!! 🙂
  2. I get a fair amount of ARCs from publishers and I try to read and review them before they are actually published. They just show up in the mail so I’m never sure what is coming at me month to month. I COULDN’T LOVE THIS MORE IF I TRIED and feel so honored to receive the best mail a lady could ask for. Literally. Book mail is my love language.
  3. I love to get new books and am always on the lookout for my new favorite read. With that, comes impulsive buys and impulse holds at the library. And then I must read said impulse book. Apparently, I’m slightly impulsive lol. But that’s not necessarily a bad thing. I stay up to date with books and publishing trends and feel in the know about it (for once in my life I’m in the know because seriously, anything else-that has NEVER been the case for me).
  4. I LOVE to read bookish blogs and follow a TON of fantastic bookstagrammers over on Instagram. I’m always getting excited over another book someone has mentioned and must find a way to read it asap. Seriously, my phone is FULL of screenshots of books I must read ASAP. Spreading the love of book and finding ‘my people’ has been the best gift I’ve ever received and I’m here for it.
  5. I’m a mood reader for sure! I often find myself with a pile of books I’ve brought on vacation with me or think I’ll tackle over the  long weekend, and yet,my mood has me heading to the bookstore or perusing my shelves to find a specific genre that I’m in the mood for. That doesn’t bode well for a TBR list. Following my moods has ALWAYS led me to great reading experiences though, so I would never want that to change. It works for me and I’m so happy about that.
  6. I can often be found perusing my local bookstores and making purchases if I find something I want. And then I must rush home and get down to business (aka reading the book I just bought). My wife and I often go on bookstore dates and it’s our absolute favorite! Again, not great for a TBR pile, but FANTASTIC for my local community! I love to support my local small businesses. It’s the heartbeat of the community and keeping your dollars local is always good for everyone involved.
  7. Lastly, I join a lot of large buddy reads over on Instagram because I love talking about books with other book lovers and those tend to pop up randomly. Some great ongoing buddy reads that I really enjoy happen with @readwithkat (I just read ‘Five Feet Apart’ with her and loved it) and @nycbookgirl (I just finished ’84, Charing Cross Road’ with her and also LOVED it. Books about books and bookstores-yes please). Plus…making more bookish friends is seriously changing my life for the better. I’m in, always, for that!

So…if anyone is like me and can’t seem to stick with a TBR list, here are some possible reasons why but also, the beauty of it. Thinking about it has helped me just acknowledge that I might not be that person who has a photo of a pretty pile of books at the beginning of the month to get through. And after working that out, that’s okay with me. I hope you find some solace with loving however it is that you read. And now…off to read a book that wasn’t part of this month’s TBR list and couldn’t be happier about that 🙂

bookishfolk…read instead.